Tips for Disassembling Your iPhone 4s

Sad Broken Screen

A couple weeks ago, I (with the help of my dog) broke the screen for my iPhone 4s.  Unfortunately, it is still about 4 months until I can upgrade at the cheaper price ($99 vs $600ish).  The LCD still worked, the touch screen function, everything on the phone worked...it was just ugly and sometimes hard to read.  More annoying than an actual problem.  Maybe I am cheap (sometimes) or maybe I am lazy and hate switching phones (definitely) so I decided to check into fixing my phone.

I did a quick search and found that you can order just the glass for $10 - including a micro tool kit and the cost of shipping.  I also knew that my brother had replaced his screen on his iPhone 3g several times.  My brother and I are pretty handy with electronics and small items (feel free to insert a penis joke here) from our pinball experience.  Google revealed that there were also plenty of articles and youtube videos of people taking apart their iPhones (please note, I didn't actually read or watch them yet...I was just checking the possibility).

I thought myself, "How hard can it be?"  I ordered a screen and wrapped my broken screen in a layer of clear packing tape to hold it together for a few days until my new glass arrived.  A few days later, I head over to my brother's place to disassemble and fix my phone.

Tip #1 - Don't

Do not take your iPhone 4s apart.  It is a much more complicated process than on older models.  It can be done...but the whole process is tedious and frustrating.  It starts off easy enough - you remove two pentalobe  screws from the bottom of your iphone (and your screen kit even came with the pentalobe screwdriver for this).  These screws are small but if you've ever had to wear glasses you are probably intimately familiar with this size of screw - not the easiest to handle, but no big deal.  Then you slide off the back...and Fuck!

Tip #2 - A Clean Environment

Not even the smallest screw that you will have to remove

The inside of the 4s is much, much, much more complicated than the 3g.  Seriously, my accolades to the people that produce these...you are amazing.  And I can't say that it is not well made and designed to stay together.  Those 2 screws you previously took out of the case?  They were largest of 4 or 5 sizes of screws that are contained inside...by a large factor.  Here is a picture of one of the screws sitting on a penny.  It is barely bigger than Lincoln's nose...and that is not even the smallest screw.  It would help to be in a place where there are not kids, pets,  or distractions.  If you drop one and you have to search for it on a hardwood floor, it is nearly impossible to find straight on...but hold a flashlight parallel to the floor and you might be able to spot the elongated shadow.  If you drop it on carpet, I have to think you are out of luck.

Tip #3 - You Need More Tools

Some of the screws you will need to remove

Your kit came with a screwdriver for these tiny phillips-head screws. It isn't too bad taking these screws out,   but a miniature screwdriver that was magnetic would help a lot putting them back in (the one in the kit isn't). There are also a couple flat head screws that need to be removed and your kit doesn't come with a flat head and the screws are so small that almost any screw driver you have at home will be too big...we ended up having to use the edge of a razor blade to get these out (couldn't find any of the old eyeglasses repair kits that might have worked...might, they might still be too large for these screws. There are a lot of screws...more than I would have guessed by a  factor of 3.  There are even screws that screw into screws.  It is literally a ridiculous amount of screws They are hard to see and hard to handle (especially to re-install), I would recommend having an offset tweezers to help you hold the tiny screws and a table mounted magnifying glass to be able to see what you are doing would be a nice touch.

How my hands felt

Tip #4 - You Need Smaller Hands

Even with all these helpful tools, your hands are still too big and disassembly/reassembly process is awkward for your human sized hands.  Even after you get all the screws out, you still need to remove all the shields over the electronics and unhook all the ribbon cables between the various components...and once again these things are tiny.  I normally think of my hands as slightly smaller than the average person and maybe not nimble but at least functional...but working on this phone made it feel like my hand was an over-inflated balloon with polish sausage fingers.  These was some serious Fee-Fi-Fo-Fum feelings on my part.


Tip #5 - Don't Buy Just the Glass

So remember at the beginning where I said that I did a quick search and there were tons of articles and videos on disassembling your iPhone...but that I didn't actually read or watch them?  Well it turns out that you can't replace just the glass screen.  The glass & LCD screen are permanently epoxied together...if you try to remove them, you end up destroying your LCD.  You can buy the glass & LCD as a unit for about $40...but I only bought the glass.

This is useless without the LCD attached

Sadly and a little angrily, I stared with disbelief at the pile of parts that used to be my phone.  I could order and screen/lcd combo but it would take about a week to get here...so I had no choice but to put my phone back together as it was.  This is trickier than it sounds because all the electronics fit in the case very snugly.  When I was about halfway through reassembly, I realized that one of the ribbon cables was slightly snagged on the underside of the screen.  This caused the ribbon cable to be about two millimeters short from connecting to the circuit board...with frustration, I had to take everything back apart and start the assembly process over.

Finally, once it was all back together (well mostly...a couple of the shields were not replaced due to being a huge pain in the ass)...we go to slide the rear cover back on but it will not fit snug down all the way.  Some component is sticking up just a little to high.  I am pretty sure it is the loud speaker/mic unit but I am too tired to care.  We try to force the cover back on but it applies too much pressure on the electronics and causing the phone not to work at all.  Removed cover and adjusted the pressure on components but didn't want to start taking things apart again to fix the slight bulge.  I am totally sick of the project by now and decide the cover will be slightly crooked.  And of course after removal a couple of times the super fine screws pretty much just strip out.  Fine!  The cover will held on by packing tape...to match packing tape on the front!  If I am going to have a ghetto phone, might as well go all out.

Tip #6 - See Tip #1

I figured this project would take 20-30, it took over 2 hours and was just a totally frustrating experience.  I was amazed that my phone still worked once it was back together.  Can it be done?  Yes.  Should it be done?  Probably not.  It would have helped and been much less frustrating if we actually accomplished something...but it would still have been a huge pain.  I wouldn't recommend it.  I don't want to take it all apart again, I am just going to keep using my ghetto phone for a few months until I can upgrade for cheap.  Actually, junk phone is kind of growing on me...plus I know when I do get a new phone, I will appreciate it that much more (and maybe have enough incentive to actually use a protective case).


PS - if you are going to make portable gadgets with glass screens, you really need to make them easily and cheaply replaceable.

It's Been a Bad Week

On June 1st 2012, my girlfriend Angie and I were in a pretty serious car accident.  I can't get into all the details at this time (due to ongoing investigations), but I can say that it was bad.  9 cars totaled bad, getting hit 4 or 5 different times at interstate speeds bad.  It may sound cliché, but we are lucky to be alive.

I was fortunate to limp away from the accident, with bumps, bruises, small cuts and scrapes.  I was checked out at the emergency room and had x-rays taken of my knee, which was a little banged up.  I have bigger and more hideously purple bruises than I have ever had in my life, but all turned out to be just minor battering from the collisions and I was given ibuprofen and sent on my way.

Angie, did not fair so well.  Angie was thrown from her wheelchair and broke both of her legs.  But not just any broken leg, she broke both of her femurs...her thigh bones, the largest bones in the human body (go big or go home I guess).  One break was a compound fracture with the bone poking through the skin.  She also had a concussion, cuts on her face, and bruises that make mine look like a kid with a scraped knee.

Angie was in the intensive care unit for 3 days and had surgery to insert steel plates and screws into her legs.  Thankfully, surgery went well.  Angie then spent several more days in a standard hospital room, before just being transferred to the in-patient rehabilitation center.  She is doing well but is still having a hard time with the pain, nausea, and just plain uncomfortableness.  She also gets hiccups a lot (possibly due to medication) and it shakes her whole body as she grimaces in pain.  It is horrible to watch.  Angie is far from out of the woods, due to her normal poor circulation and weak immune system, but so far she is doing well.  We are not sure of anything of her treatment future, but it could only be a few weeks or it could be all summer.  It all depends on her healing progress and what the doctors say.  It is going to be a long and expensive recovery.

If the pain and hospital stay wasn't bad enough, we are also pretty sure that her adapted van is totaled, as is her power wheel hair.  We are not sure what insurance is going to cover - supposedly only the van itself is able to be covered under a normal insurance policy, not the ramp, kneel kit, hand controls and computers that she needs to ride and drive...unfortunately all this equipment is very expensive (around $100,000 without the van itself - it may have looked like your typical 2002 maroon caravan, but it had as much equipment as a James Bond car and was in the price range of Bentleys and Porches)...but even before getting her up and driving again, her family will need to get a transport van for every day travel - get her home, to doctor appointments, to church, etc... We are also not sure how much of her powered wheel chair will be covered, and surprising to most people these chairs cost more than many cars (around $35,000-$40,000), but the are a necessity for the people that rely on them for every day functioning.  It is amazing technology that has allowed Angie to live a relatively normal life these past few years.

A small selection of the flowers Angie recieved

But we are doing OK, we are alive and that is the important thing.  We appreciate all of your thoughts, prayers, and well wishes.  Angie has already received many visitors, cards, and flowers and is grateful for all of the friends and family that have been there for her in all shapes and forms.  It has really helped Angie keep her spirits up!  Something that we need to do to help her stay positive and focus on healing and just feeling better.

We hate to ask for money, but if you would like to donate something, it would be much appreciated.  All donations will go to help Angie with medical bills, a new wheel chair, and new transportation.  And more importantly, it will be one less thing she has to worry about so that she can focus on her healing and recovery.  Below is a Paypal link for donating (it processes through my account since Angie really isn't in shape to set up her own at this time), please pass along to everyone that knows her, every little bit helps.

or mail to:

Angie Plager Recovery Fund
32541 585^th Ave
Cambridge, IA 50046-8568

Who's Bad (taste in art)?

A few weeks ago, I happened to be in Radio Shack.  RS had a relatively large free standing display of Michael Jackson products - posters, This Is It DVDs, and miscellaneous MJ trinkets.  I was about to walk by when my eye was caught by this monstrosity of an album cover.

Click to embiggen and see all the horrible, horrible detail

Wow, Michael Jackson in golden armor, ruffled collar, red velvet cap, monarch alighted on shoulder while being crowned by cherubs?  Wow!  I guess you are trying to say "King of Pop" or something but that isn't even saying it.  That is shouting it from a mountain into a megaphone that fed a microphone into the world's largest PA system...in the cheesiest and gayest way possible.  And the sequined glove over the heart multiplies the cheese factor by about 50%.

My first thought was "That is the worst cover I have ever seen on a bootleg" or maybe not bootleg but those crappy third party CDs of live songs that are always terrible.  Imagine my surprise when I found out that it was an official Epic Records release of unfinished Michael Jackson songs.  It looks anything but official to me.  Plus the album cover doesn't even make sense for the album...it might be ok for a greatest hits album as it shows a bunch of highlights from his career but it really makes no sense for an album of unfinished tracks.  I guess the painting was commissioned by his estate or something but man is it terrible.  I know Michael Jackson had a lot of horrible art from the Neverland Ranch auction photos and this fits in...I just can't believe someone green lit it for the album's cover.

Another example of crazy art - photo courtesy of Paulshceer flickr set.
(follow link for more egomaniac art and weird stuff from the Neverland
Ranch auction)

I actually like Michael Jackson quite a bit, but there is no way that I will ever by an album with a cover like this...and yes, I realize that I am 'judging a book by it's cover' but I spent many, many, many hours in record stores as a youth flipping through records and you often can judge a record by its cover.  The more jumbled an album cover, the worse the album hiding behind it.  The one good thing I can say about this album cover is that it is better than Pantera's debut album cover (but only a little).

Bittersweet

Hey, Peter man, check out channel 9

I know I've mentioned it before but I really hate when TV shows are canceled before their time...I hate being left hanging.  This is all more poignant to me after having just finished the DVD set of Defying Gravity...my favorite new show of last fall and highly recommended.  Yes, it only has 13 episodes but each episode is great and packs a lot of intelligence and emotion into each episode.  I was pissed when ABC canceled this show after showing only half the episodes.  ABC ordered 13 episodes, so I assume they paid for 13 episodes...why not throw the last ones on the air at 2am?  Wouldn't that be better than doing nothing?  I don't know, I am not a TV exec.  Anyhow, watching the DVDs reminded me at how sad it was to have this show canceled.

However, I am finding it hard to feel the same way about Syfy (that still makes me want to puke) cancelling Caprica a couple of weeks ago.

A little personal history - I didn't watch the Battlestar Galatica redux series until after it was completed.  Mainly because I thought my DVR was missed episodes when it first started showing.  This ended up being a miscommunication since the first few episodes were combined into the pilot movie.  In my error, I couldn't stand watching a show like BSG where I missed a couple episodes.  Each episode seemed too important, too amazing to miss.  So finally, I deleted the episodes off my DVR and didn't watch more than a random half episode here or there before the series was over.  I am actually surprised that I made it without anyone having spoiled the show or the ending for me.

I didn't start watching BSG, until the entire series was over and released on DVD.  Once I started watching it, I could not stop.  The first thing that pulled me in was the situational stress - a tiny remnant of humanity, forced into aging and ships, fleeing with no supplies.  In addition to the danger of the Cylons finding them, there was always the pressure of fuel, food, and vacuum of space.  Add to that possible traitors, hidden spies, factions among the remaining humans and every episode was tense.  Even if the episode didn't seem that tense, there was always this backdrop of danger.  BSG had much more than that though, the characters were well written and had a great depth.  There were heroes and villains, and everything else in between - military, civilians, people thrown out of their league, people struggling to live and overcome their adversity.  It is a special show where heroes can develop into villains and villains into heroes.  It is an odd show where many different opinions exist about every character and they are all right.  I think the misunderstanding for people who didn't watch Battlestar Galatica was that they thought it was an action series.  It did have plenty of action in the form of spaceship dog fights and the occasional shootout with cylons but it really was a small part of the series after the first couple episodes.  More important were characters and their interactions, myth, and destiny.  It was truly an epic saga and probably one of the best series that has ever been on TV.


Watching six seasons of BSG within a month and a half instead of 5 years had it's advantages.  It was nice not having to wait between seasons and I probably noticed some details that other might have missed between episodes.  But there was one major disadvantage, everyone else I knew had already watched it.  This meant that we couldn't talk about this week's episode or discuss theories.  It had already happened for all of my friends and I didn't want to risk ruining my viewing of my next DVD.  I missed all the social aspect of the series and that makes me a little sad (same thing happened with Lost).

I thought this photo captured the depth and intricacies
of the characters perfectly.

So when Caprica was announced I was excited to be able to watch the show as it aired and have the social experience of discussing it with others in a timely manner.  Unfortunately, the first episode aired and it was pretty meh.  It wasn't terrible, but it wasn't really gripping either.  I could see promise though and hoped it would develop into something wonderful and surprising.  I'm sure my expectations were a little higher than they should have been because I knew it was going to be a different kind of show than BSG.  The creators and producers had announced that very early on and I was OK with that.

The actors were good, the special effects were decent, but for me it was the story and characters that I had issues with.  It's not that the stories and characters were bad, it just seemed to be unraveling the parts of BSG that I liked.  Well not unraveling, so much as destroying.

Destroyed Myth #1:  Monotheism was a robot invention.  In Battlestar Galatica, the humans were polytheistic.  They basically worshiped versions of our Greek gods...but the cylons, the robots were monotheistic.  One god, similar in form to Christianity/Judaism/Islam.  Did their super computer brains deduce there was only one god, was it a corruption in their programming?  It was never explained but I always found it very compelling to have it scripted this way.  Caprica has human monotheistic cults, and one of them just happens to have their memory loaded into the first cylon prototype...the cylon that will be copied for all future cylons, so the "one god" idea was a human idea.  For me, cylons lost some of their danger...they weren't thinking as radically different from humans as I thought.

Destroyed Myth #2:  Cylons evolved artificial intelligence.  Again, I thought that man created the cylons and overtime corruption or deduction led to cylon artificial intelligence.  Nope, their intelligence is due to the brain scan loaded into the first cylon...without this the cylons were useless.

Destroyed Myth #3:  Cylons were created to benefit society.  I don't know if it was ever specifically mentioned, but for some reason I thought the cylons were created to be helpful to the human race.  Yes, they would provide labor and the workforce, allowing humans to be more creative and enjoy themselves.  I thought that later they cylons were co-opted for military purposes or maybe only because violent when they rebelled.  Not so.  According to Caprica, their first purpose was military purposes.  Of course if you create something evil it will turn on you, I found it much more compelling when I thought something created in a good spirit became bitter and turned on their creators.

There are many more ideas that I had which Caprica just destroyed but those are some of the main tenets in my mind.  The show had more problems than that though.  The main thing that really turned me off were that all characters were pretty morally corrupt.  There just wasn't a character that I could relate too (being such a bastion of virtue that I am).  I found it hard to watch and felt that I didn't have anyone to root for.  Do you root for the business man that will do anything to make money, the members of the mob, or the religious cult with terrorist intentions?  I couldn't relate to any of them.  It was not like BSG where semi-normal people were thrown into a situation where they were forced to make the best of all bad choices...the Caprica characters were just kind of evil from the beginning.

I also was hoping for more of the other eleven planets of the twelve colonies in Battlestar Galactica.  Yes, it was named Caprica...so obviously most of the story will take place there but I hoped to see more of the other planets.  And when they did show the other planets?  All indoor shots.  It was disappointing.  To have a solar system to use but yet to focus on only one location.  I was also disappointed in the views of Caprica City.  I think they were trying to show it as a society at it's peak, were everything starts to become corrupt...but even so, it just didn't feel quite right.  BSG takes place less than 60 years later and it is a beautiful and idyllic place. From the corruption and dirtiness of Caprica to the peacefulness of BSG in 60 years...including a 10+ year war in-between?  It just didn't see right.

Caprica's Cylon

But and image I couldn't get out of my brain was the cylon itself.  At first glance, I was like that is pretty bad ass.  Of course, it is bulkier and not as refined as the cylons of the future but it is pretty good.  But the more I saw it, the more it disturbed me.  It was several episodes in before I decided what it was...and my perception is totally affected by my knowing that Zoe's (the creators daughter) personality is loaded inside.  I think those are ammo magazines encircling its waist but combine that with the two silver ol' timey microphone looking things on it's chest and this is what I see every single time (color enhanced for your pleasure).  I really wish I didn't.

What I wish I didn't see

That all being said, Caprica wasn't horrible.  I did keep coming back and watching week after week...but it was usually the show on my DVR that I would watch last.  The show I would watch when I had run out of other stuff to watch.  I did find some of it interesting, I just didn't find it nearly as engrossing as Battlestar Galactica had been.  I am slightly disappointed to see it go, because I think that maybe it would have evolved into something better.  However, it's cancellation supposedly has allowed Syfy (ack) to change the planned webisode series Blood and Chrome into a regular television series.  Blood and Chrome is purported to be centered around the first Cylon war...the war where the robots rebelled.  It sounds like it will be closer in feeling to BSG than to Caprica.  I'm looking forward to it.

Mistakes Have Been Made

Over the weekend, I realized/remembered a grievous error had been made on my part. I had once loaned out my "The Monkey Represents Sharing" t-shirt.  It was an incident where said person's own t-shirt had become befouled at my house.   And being a good host, I freely loaned one of my favorite shirts...plus I figured the slogan was very apt for the situation.  The monkey *did* represent sharing.  Unfortunately, I never saw the monkey again.  It has now been five years.  The borrower has now had the t-shirt twice as long as I possessed it.  I've thought about purchasing another...but it wouldn't be the same.


I am sure the shirt is long gone from their closet...but it will be forever in my heart.

Music for a Mood

I am feeling really down and depressed today...many reasons but mostly just because I am a moody bitch at times (and I suck).

Misery loves company, or so they say...I don't really want to make anyone else unhappy but it definitely helps me to listen to someone else's misery in song form.  What can I say...someone cool like that being emotionally fucked up helps me deal with my own feelings.

Here are my top 3 beautiful/horrible songs for when I am feeling like I fucked up my life.

Brick by Ben Folds Five



Thankfully, I have never been in this situation but I think they captured the emotions perfectly.  Who hasn't felt like the were drowning in a relationship or feeling totally alone when with someone?  I first heard this song when I was a college DJ filling in for some one's shift on Valentines Day (I had no plans as I was a loser - not much has changed).  We regularly played BFF but I had never listened to a whole album.  Some random girl who sounded vaguely upset called in and requested this song.  During the song, I wished *69 worked on campus because I really think she needed a hug because this was the least Valentines Day song that I had ever heard.  Whoever you are - I still wonder about you not only every time I hear this song, but every Valentines Day too...I hope everything worked out (thanks for pointing out this song to me).

Slow Motion by Third Eye Blind



This is my favorite 3eb song...but man it is powerful and depressing.  I can always listen to this song and think that at least I am not THIS screwed up (yet).

Hurt by Johnny Cash



Of course I knew this as an NIN song well before this cover.  But damn Johnny owns this!  There is something about him being towards the end of his life that makes this song so much more powerful...you can really feel the pain, you know there is no time for redemption here.


There are many more...but these are the top three that always bring me a little comfort in depression.

Go Team Polo! I mean USA!

The Branding of America (the federal constitutional republic)

Maybe you saw the new Olympic wardrobe by Ralph Lauren announced earlier this week. This is the clothing that will be worn in the opening ceremonies, around the Olympic village, and pretty much most any time the athletes are not actually wearing theirIt pretty much makes me sick. I like the design of the outfits themselves, but seriously should the Ralph Lauren logos be bigger than either the United States Flag or Olympic logos? Since when is it The United States by Ralph Lauren. Don't get me wrong, I think it is great that RL is supporting the US Olympic team and I think the company deserves exposure for their sponsorship. I just think promoting the company more than the team or even the Olympics themselves is the wrong message to be sending. It does not seem to be the spirit of the Olympic games. I just don't like it.

This is the type of thing that can only get worse. Let's look at the Polo style shirts from the past two Olympic games. The 2008 polo shirt by Nike on the right, still has the Nike logo and swoosh as a sponsorship should, but the logo is smaller than the USA Olympic logo, there for not the main focus. The 2010 by Ralph Lauren on the other hand has the pony twice the size of the USA Olympic logo. My eye focuses on the pony well before the team, I feel like I will be watching corporations compete instead of representations of countries.

Even the hoodie by Ralph Lauren for the 2008 (right) was much more subdued with the logo than the current. That is RL Polo logo on the sleeve, much nicer than a huge RL_10.

Ralph Lauren wasn't the first, for a while it felt like watching the Home Depot team with all the commercials they aired about HD employing more Olympic athletes. The difference there was that it was a commercial, not the outfits at the games themselves. I still knew Home Depot was a major sponsor and supporter but during the games themselves there was enough of a separation for me not to feel like I was rooting for Team Home Depot, I was rooting for Team USA. Maybe I will feel this way when the Olympics do arrive in a couple weeks...but right now all I can think is "Go team Polo by Ralph Lauren!"

I hear this is what the outfits will look like for the 2014 Winter Olympic Games.

OK, this is just a Jeff Gordon NASCAR coat with a few Olympic and other logos added...but you can see this coming, right? Brawndo The Thirst Mutilator!

I do however love the mascot Quatchi. Quatchi rules. So cute, cuddly, friendly, and welcoming. Good job Vancouver. You made Izzy (AKA - Whatizit) look like a real piece of garbage in comparison (by the way, he was a piece of garbage...might as well have been Springy from the Simpsons). Epic Fail USA. Gold in the mascot field goes to Vancouver, USA did not even qualify for this event.

Humans Are Doomed

A few days ago, I found myself explaining to an accountant why when you increase a number by a certain percent, you can't just take 90% of that to get back to the original number.

An Accountant! Shouldn't he know this? He is after all PAID to work with numbers. Thankfully, I don't work at the same company or I would be scared shitless for my job as I can't even imagine the accounting errors happening.

After tyring to explain it for a few minutes, I just had to lay it out like I was talking to a kid in fourth grade.

Me: OK, say you have something that is $100, and you want to increase the
price by 10%. How would you do that?

Him: Multiply it by 1.1.

Me: Right, you want to multiply the number by 1 plus an additional 10%.
So your $100 now equals $110.

Him: I increased it by 10%, so I should just be able to take 90% of that right?

Me: No, because you are now working with a higher starting number. 10% of
$100 = $10, so that is your increase, but 10% of $110 = $11. So if you decreased by that amount you will not get the original number, you would actually get a lower number $99.

Him: Oh, I get it! So how do you go from the higher number back to the original.

Me: It is a little more complicated and since it took you so long to understand the first part (about 15 minutes by this time), there is no way that I am going to go into that with you.

The whole conversation reminded me that the human race is probably doomed and reminded me of this great math quiz answer (even though it doesn't have an elephant).

I am an Idiot

It probably doesn't come as much surprise that I am an idiot. You are probably thinking to yourselves "No duh, it is so obvious that you don't even need to mention it." But I thought I would share some of my idiocy.

I often don't know what year it is. I'm not stupid (OK, maybe) or that I can't remember the date. It's just that I spend of lot of my time at work forecasting sales of some 4000+ part numbers. I study trends, look over promotions, gauge customer support, judge product lifespans, etc... and then for about 2 weeks each month I enter the forecast into our system. This forecast is 6-12 months in the future, so I am constantly typing dates like 01/15/2010. After typing out 6 months worth of dates for 4000 part numbers, my brain starts to forget that it is actually 2009. It makes sense, 2010 has just been pounded into it 20,000 times, but it does make me feel like an idiot some times. I know it is 2009 after I think about it but my mind first jumps to 2010.

I often fear that I will faint, bump my head, or fall unconscious. Then upon being shaken awake by nearby people, someone will ask me what year it is to test my mental faculties and I will give the wrong year. Of course they will then think that I am crazy (or maybe I traveled back in time) and I will be locked away in some institution.

Just another reason why I suck.

No, But I Could Beat Him/Her Up (probably)

I have never watched "Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader?" It is not my style of trivia show. I am more of a Jeopardy-style trivia person. That is question and answer, none of the "final answer" bullshit, talking out the answer, no help from the audience, phone friend, or partner. I believe either you answer the question right or you don't. I can't stand when shows drag 15 minutes worth of questions out for an hour, it is so boring...I think I actually become dumber myself when that happens.

Every time I see a commercial for Fifth Grader, I am curious. No, I am not really curious to watch it. I have lived my life by the credo that the less Jeff Foxworthy and I mix together, the better...and it has worked pretty well so far. It makes me curious about what it the show is trying to say about the educational system. Here are the possibilities in my mind:

• Fifth Graders are so much smarter now, that they can easily whoop an adults ass in a trivia contest.


• Adults should have learned all this in fifth grade themselves, but they were poor students.


• Adults learned all this information but forgot it.

I think this show just goes to prove that the information taught in school is pretty useless in everyday life and therefore forgotten. We teach kids facts and figures, the majority of which will never be brought up again after the test next week. The brain is designed to discard useless information that it no longer needs (that is why you can't remember what you had to eat on Tuesday two weeks ago...it wasn't important or special to warrant brain and thought space). I think when you teach kids loads of facts without any context for connecting it with their daily lives they are bound to forget these facts in a short period of time. Yes, some facts are important but instead of cramming our kids full of facts, we need to teach them how to think. We need to teach a child how to research and apply what they don't know and connect it with themselves. Knowing a lot of trivia questions doesn't not necessarily make you intelligent.

Update - Twilight (I Was Right!)

Finished Twilight last week, here is a recap of the second-half.

Bella did end up in the hospital with a broken leg, broken ribs, and many cuts and bruises...and what did Edward tell everyone? Yep, that she fell down the stairs. Ha ha ha. Oh and that he must really love her because he was able to stop.

Nothing like getting teen girls used to the idea that abusive relationships are good. Way to go!

I'm sure that was all in the movie, but I tried to block as much of the movie from my mind as possible. I was cracking up when I read this.

I am now cleansing my brain with His Dark Materials #3, before I give Twilight 2: More Twilightier (or is it Twilight 2: Twilight-Boogaloo?) a try.

I Feel Dirty

GF-Unit asked me to read the Twilight books. She read and enjoyed them. I deduced that she enjoyed them highly from her gasping and "Oh my god"s that escaped her while reading the final one. She wants someone to talk about them with and instead of finding another person who has read them (I am sure there are plenty of 13 year old girls she could rave about Edward with), she has asked me to give them a try.

Reluctantly, I have agreed because I figure I can't complain too much until I actually read them...then I can complain all I want (and I'm not buying them, so I am not really supporting them). I just got back from my lunch break where I read a little bit (very little 15 pages!). Nothing has even happened yet and already I feel dirty from the book. I am sure it would be better if I hadn't seen the movie. Although the deleted scene that CT linked to was awesome and a better movie it would have been had it been included.

Anyhow, if you see me reading these books, please know that it is only as a favor to GF-Unit (and her taste is suspect).

R.I.P.

Sadness.