60% Dork

I have long known that I am a dork. I've always enjoyed all the dorky things in life - Tolkien (long before the movies), Star Wars, Star Trek, D&D, Dr Who, sci-fi, fantasy, comic books, action figures...that type thing. I agree more with Dwight on the If it is dorky, I will usually like it. I just have never known how dorky. Hetero Life-Pal CT and I once went to a Star Trek convention...it cost $15 - I was expecting maybe $5. I was very disappointed in the whole experience, so I could always say "At least I am not THAT dorky..."

Star Wars was always one of my biggest dork weaknesses - Yes, I have watched all three original movies in a single night. Yes, I saw all the re-releases on opening night. Yes, I can quote way too many Star Wars lines. Yes, I have bought the Star Wars soundtrack on more than one occasion. What can I say? Going to see Star Wars in the theater is one on my earliest memories.

When Marc Ecko Cut & Sew came out with his Boba Fett hoodie last year, I thought "I am not dorky enough to spend $100 on a Star Wars hoodie." Although I think there are tons of cool Star Wars toys available now (have you seen the Lego Star Destroyer? Awesome.) I have always avoided buying them...not wanting to be the middle-age Star Wars collecting dork who proclaims his religion as The Force. Secretly though, I coveted the hoodie and had little day dream fantasies of wearing it. Today, they are having a 40% off sale. I found out that I must be 60% dork because that seemed a reasonable price to pay (still a little high for a hoodie but at least palatable).

Well people like that reform. Maybe we should get us some.

I'm not big into the old politicin'. I know it is a fantastic part of country and I believe in it, I really do. It just usually isn't for me for many reasons:

• Most the time, I couldn't really care less and am bored with all the politics and TV/radio ads by January - so by the time that the actual election comes around, I literally hate everyone involved.
• I am usually pretty familiar with the main people running for the main positions (i.e. president, governor, state senator, etc...), but the other positions are often just a list of names that I know nothing about. Do I randomly pick someone? Do I pick a name that may be slightly familiar? Do I do as me and CT do on NTN trivia if we don't know and go with a name that is either noticeably longer or shorter than the rest? Do I choose a name that sounds nice or has cool alliteration? Do I choose C? This choice makes me feel anxious because I don't want to pick someone that sucks but how can I choose anyone if I don't know anything about them. I don't need that stress. I should study more before I reach the voting booth but seriously I am not going to remember the majority of the lesser positions any way. So I let someone who cares enough to learn or at least cares enough to randomly choose a name pick.
• I hate that there are really only two feasible parties. There needs to be more variety. Yes, I know there was the Green party, the Libertarian party, etc... on the ballot but since the two party system is so ingrained into US politics they have no real chance. I would like to see more candidates that can encompass more values from all the parties. I don't like that for the most part we seem to be "For Us" or "Against Us" when it comes to political parties. I can't seem to vote a straight party ticket, I have to vote for each person and position in their own right because I don't just want a "party drone" I want an individual that can think for himself and know when to tell the rest of his party to fuck off.
• The majority of the reason that I usually haven't voted is because I have been of the idea/opinion that there would be slight differences in styles and policies between presidents but with all their (presumably intelligent) advisers, cabinet members, checks and balances that for the major issues, the important issues - that presidents would all do pretty much the same job. With the W administration increasing the president's power, eliminating checks and balances, and deteriorating our civil rights - I no longer believe this.

This year is the first year that I have voted since my first eligible year to vote (1992). I did vote for Obama although I can see why people would vote for McCain. It's not that I didn't like McCain, I voted for Obama because he is a much more charismatic leader. I think that is the type of leader that will be able to rally people to change the country (hopefully for the better) and also keep people encouraged in the bad times (like the situation with the economy). I think both candidates would have made decent presidents...I just think that Obama seems a little bit more like a leader. Someone that I would follow. I hope he can help put our country back on track to being respected, rather than being seen as a bully. I hope he realizes that the government has over-stepped in bounds in the name of security and reinstates civilian rights and governmental checks and balances. I hope that Obama can lead our country out of a state of fear and that someday I will be able to fly again with my shampoo and without having to take off my shoes. I am hopeful that change has come and it will be change for the better. (I would hope all the same if McCain had won).

Some of my voting tips:

• Always vote not to re-elect judges and sheriffs. They have too much power to get complacent or comfortable enough that they feel they can start abusing their power.
• Vote for a person not their party.
• Feel free to write yourself in for any position where you don't feel comfortable making a choice.
• If you can vote for more than one candidate for a post still keep it limited to what you know. Just because you can vote for up to four people doesn't mean you have to...make your top picks count, don't dilute them for just for the sake of voting.
• Don't vote for the guy with the midget - no matter how stumpy...he is really a white supremacist and not a "friend of the little man."
• If you don't want to vote - DON'T! Don't let someone try to talk you into it if you don't want to (then you are doing what they want). This is a democracy - you can choose or not. That's what is great about it. Is voting a Right? Yes. But you don't have to take advantage of it if you don't want to. So is "keeping and bearing arms" and I don't own a gun (...yet) and I don't feel bad about that. I especially like when someone tries to tell me that "If you don't vote, then you can't complain." Of course I can! I didn't vote for the person.

OK enough politicin'. I hope the coverage is over soon...because I have long been sick of it. If I hear "Joe the Plumber" one more time, I am going to snap and kick that person in the shins. You will (most likely) not hear another word about it from me.

You Fools

On Saturday, my younger brother Ryan married Hedda - his longtime gf-unit. Truthfully, I am not sure how he suckered her into it. Hedda is great and I don't know if Ryan could have found a better woman (I mean any girl that watches Big Booty White Girls 4 with you can't be that bad right? - Yeah you guys still owe me $15 from that!). Ryan on the other hand, I had written off from the gene pool long ago when he nicknamed himself Odie Joey Dinky. He had no brain when he was younger, I was sure he was going to Darwin himself at some point. But his brain seems to have kicked in sometime in the last ten years and he was smart enough not to let Hedda get away... How she puts up with him I don't know - it must be love or something.

It was a little ceremony and reception at Living History Farms - the one downside was that I had to be a groomsman. I thought the rehearsal was a waste of time since I am pretty good at both walking and standing, usually being able to do both on demand without much practice. At least, I wasn't the Pastor like my internet ordained older brother (ha ha!). I really wanted him to go "Wuv, Twue wuv..." ala The Princess Bride, but it was not to be...It will so happen at my wedding (if that ever comes about).

I am not a big fan of weddings...in fact this is the first one that I have been to in 10 years or so. I even skipped out on Hetero Life-Pal CT's wedding (and then made his wife not like me for a while by writing "Demonic Rituals" in the memo field of the check I sent them - I thought it was funny). Now that I have been to one wedding and had a decent enough time, it does not mean you should be expecting me at any future weddings that I should be invited to. This one was a favor for my bro...it was a one time deal. If you invite me, there is a 98.2% chance that I will not come.

Here is a picture of me looking awesome (as always):

Congratulations Ryan & Hedda - You guys are awesome (and had good ham at the reception).

The Long Goodbye - I hate it

Not the book or the movie...the act itself. I hate long goodbyes. When I say something like "Well, I better go," that means I want to leave - now. I am not one of those people who plays the "No, you hang up first," "No, you" game. Chances are after I have said goodbye, the phone is already away from my ear and my thumb reaching for disconnect. I'll probably hear you say goodbye back to me but it will be from a distance. I am this way on the phone (both personally and professionally...I know they say that customer service agents are never supposed to hang up first but I always did) as well as, in person. Yeah, I'll stick around for a quick goodbye and hug and kiss (depending on our relationship) but I really don't want this to last longer than a minute or two and if it is only 30 seconds then all the better.


Unfortunately, the GF-Unit has a problem with this...dragging out goodbyes for 10 minutes, 15 minutes, 30 minutes, even an hour or more. She has no idea how much this irritates me. When I say "I (or You) should probably go," that means just that. Go. It could be many reasons - I need to do other things, I am tired, I am frustrated, I have had enough of you for today, etc... but it all comes down to: I want to part company as soon as possible.


The other week this came up when GF-Unit was over one night. It was a night we hadn't planned of seeing each other, so I already had a list of stuff in my head that I wanted to accomplish. Circumstances brought us together and I thought we had a decent night together but eventually I was in the mood for no more that night. I knew the longer she stayed the more annoyed I would get, not at her...but at the situation and that she was there. I suggested that she should go. She started to go but then was all sad about it, so started dragging it out. We tried talking about it and I was urging her to go while trying not to hurt her feelings. It wasn't working too well, so it got to the point where I just said "I don't want you to be sad...I just want you to leave."


I know, I know, I am not the most sensitive person in the world. At the time I was about 60% joking, 40% serious. It made me crack up when I said it...and I think it made her laugh a little after the initial shock. But it was true, I didn't want her to be sad (really), I just didn't want to deal with her any more that night...I wanted to do some of the things I already had planned. I knew we would be spending plenty of time together over the coming weeks - more days than not, and I never get the things around the house done like cleaning, dishes, laundry, repairs, improvements,etc... So I really wanted to use this night to get a little bit done.


No lasting harm done (I think)...and a Classic Quote from me (I think), so it is all for the best. But really, I do hate long goodbyes. If I had more to say, I would have said it earlier before I felt spent with the whole deal. If you keep it short and sweet, I will go away much happier and start missing you. Long goodbyes are just mentally draining and numbing.

How to Name a Band

Stolen from my Hetero Life Pal CT's blog. I usually don't blog this kind of stuff because I look at it like one of those crappy forwarded emails...that cause me to sigh, delete, and reply "Do you think I am stupid?" Seriously, why would Microsoft/AOL give you money for forwarding an email...but even more importantly why are you still forwarding this crap to me 5 years later that when I first received it? Oh and by the way, that Nigerian Prince thing might not be on the up and up. I really liked the info I got from this: the name, the album title, the artwork - I would buy it! I've bought albums for fewer reasons. Click the links on the info to see where they came from).

1. Go to http://en.wikipedia.org/ first random Wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.




2. Go to Random quotations: http://www.quotationspage.com/ last four words of the very last quote of the page is the title of your first album. (If you want to do this again, you'll hit refresh to generate new quotes, because clicking the quotes link again will just give you the same quotes over and over again.)




3. Go to flickr's "explore the last seven days" http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7daysThird picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

My Band Name: Hütter Hü 136

My Album Title: don't have a J.O.B.

My Album Cover:

The American Dream

Instead of spending Thursday evening at Billy Joe's with Hetro Life Pal CT (it was a crap movie that neither of us wanted to pay for - even though I do like the eyes of the dumb girl from Mean Girls), I spent the night building a kit dollhouse for my niece, America (human). America (human) doesn't have a dollhouse so I figured that instead of using a cardboard box as a shanty house, I would get her one for Christmas. I figured that I could buy a plastic prefab Barbie type house or I could get a kit and put a little effort into it and make something custom made for her. About 6 hours in, I was wishing I had opted for the Barbie crap shack. I did persevere at last - 300+ pieces, half a bottle of wood glue, 8 hours, and much cursing later it looked like this at 2am.

Not too bad for $30. Next up will be some light sanding, painting, and using some of the wood scraps to build some furniture and accessories...and maybe adding a light. Then the unveiling at Christmas, talking her into a subprime adjustable rate mortgage, and foreclosure next summer. The American Dream in action for America (human).

Hockey Looking Good

The Iowa Chops played their first regular season game on Friday. After three years of Iowa Stars hockey and management, I was optimistic but trying not to get my hopes too high. I was very pleased with the game. Our new team is big, tough, physical, and talented. They didn't give up when they were down 3-0 and scored 5 unanswered goals to win. It was a great game. The crowd was wild and crazy. The Chops went on to win the next night but lost a close game on Sunday...three games in a row is a little much, I am sure our guys were tired. I would strongly suggest checking them out this season for an entertaining evening. Remember to check out number 6 - Bobby Ryan (or Ricky Bobby as we like to call him since he has two first names). Ryan was the number 2 draft pick in 2005 (second only to Sidney Crosby). Ryan is NHL quality and will be lighting the lamp in Anaheim soon enough - I figure he is only playing down here for the first part of the season so the Ducks don't have to pay him all the bonuses he would get as a full time NHLer...thereby staying within the salary cap and saving him for the playoff grind at the end of the season. He is one you must see while you have the chance but we have many other talented players as well. Your next chance to check out the chops is this Friday and Saturday at Wells Fargo Arena. I'll be there in section 103 (as usual) so stop bye and say hello.

Go Meat!

Picture Stolen from - www.mycameraon.com

Call me Patient Zero

I have been sick since Saturday. Stomach ache, cramps, diarrhea cha cha cha. I have spent the last four days either on the couch or on the toilet. The couch was much preferable, because even the softest toilet paper now feels like 80 grit sandpaper to my backside. So unfortunately, I missed golfing with my bro (boo), missed the Chops pre-season game (boo), and missed 2 days of work (yay). It was not one of those illnesses where I could enjoy my time off even a little bit as mostly I was in some form of extreme discomfort most of the time. While wasting my days in the bathroom, I did get a good start on The Golden Compass...so if any good had come from this illness, I guess that would be it. Also I ate an entire box of Townhouse Crackers within a 24 hour period...not a record for me, but at least I had an excuse this time "I had an upset stomach and crackers are supposed to calm it." That sounds better than "I just really, really like crackers."

Since I have been sick it seems that everyone else around me has been sick too - two of my brothers and one of their GFs, my boss, and a couple friends. I guess I must be patient zero in this epidemic since I don't know who I got it from...so I apologize to anyone I know that has been feeling sick the last week.

If being sick for four days wasn't enough, I have also contracted Urushiol-Induced Contact Dermatitis (aka Poison Ivy). I am highly allergic to poison ivy and often don't even have to touch it to contract it. Just getting close is enough for me, there is often enough oil in the air to affect me. I wasn't always this way, when young I never had a reaction to poison ivy and sometimes would flaunt this to people by purposely playing with it (and once even eating it). I now know this was incredibly stupid because people's resistance to it weakens over time and with each contact. I am paying for that young foolishness now. I have contracted a poison ivy rash every summer since my first one at age 19. I thought I was going to escape this summer...but the camping must have done me in. It has now been almost two weeks, I shouldn't get any more outbreaks...just have to wait for the ones I have to heal.

A Strange Week

This week has been very strange and varied for me.

Roughing It

It started off camping at Acorn Valley over the weekend. Why camping? I am still not quite sure, but it was something different to do and probably the last really nice weekend to do it. It was a good time...nothing special but nice to get away from hectic pace of normal life. Plus a little naughtyness in the woods is always fun. We were at campsite 61 which was far enough away from most other people yet close to bathrooms, forest trails, and the playground. Our tent was a little smaller and a little more rustic than the one pictured above.

High Culture

Tuesday was the first show in this year's Civic Center season ticket package. It was a play called Frost/Nixon, about the way that the admittance of wrongdoing and subsequent apology came about years after he resigned. It was entertaining but I wouldn't call it engrossing. It didn't really make me think much or enlighten me in some way, it just filled a couple hours with something besides TV or video games. Would I have paid to see it if it wasn't part of the season ticket package? No, but I don't feel that it was a waste of time either. Elvis was not mentioned. Looking forward to Spamalot (again)!

A Journey to the Past

Wednesday, we (me, GF-Unit, Kinda-Kid) went to WFA to see Walking with Dinosaurs Live. It was a really good show. I thought it seemed a little short but it was a very entertaining show (if you have any interest in dinosaurs). The dinos looked pretty realistic and cool. The Kinda-Kid knew the big dinos were fake right away because there was a car thing between their legs that drove them around (although it was disguised so it wasn't completely distracting). The smaller dinos (raptors, baby t-rex, etc...) that were people in suits had him fooled for about half the show. He finally realized that you could see the actor's legs about halfway through the show. They all did a very good job, the dinosaurs moved very realistically and if you used a little imagination you could pretend they were real. We got the cheaper tickets (around $25/ea) and it was well worth that price. I don't know if it is worth the higher $60 ticket price - to me probably not, but I felt I got my money's worth for what I paid. I had a good time and I don't think the Kinda-Kid will forget the show any time soon. If you have young-ish children, I would suggest giving it a shot.

Familial Stupidity Part 1 (vicariously)

Tonight (Thursday), I am going with Hetero-Life Pal CT to Billy Joes to see Step Brothers. I think it looks hilarious and need a good laugh after the past few weeks of crappy movies. Also there is the added plus of bar food. I am not sure if the mini-corn dogs are calling my name or if I am hungry for something else this week...it will have to be a game time decision.

A Literary Event

Borders bookshop is haveing their Educator's Appreciation Weekend. There is a reception Friday night. I am not an educator but GF-Unit is (or is studying to be), so she really wants to check it out...me? I just find it hard to turn down going to a bookstore for any reason.

Familial Stupidity Part 2 (in person)

Sunday morning, my brother is gathering a bunch of friends together for a golf tournament...I think it is basically his bachelor party since it is opposite his fiance's bridal shower. I suck at golf, but I always have fun. Noonan.

Slap Shot

The Iowa Chops first pre-season game takes place at the Buccaneer Arena. It technically has free admission but I think they are asking for a $7 donation to Youth Hockey. I am excited to see the Chops in action. I am looking forward to a winning season for once. You should go...it will be fun.

Happy Banned Books Week

This week is Banned Books week...the week when we celebrate the freedom of choice and the freedom of expression. Just because someone write something that you don't agree with does not mean that it is wrong or that other people will not enjoy reading it. Banning books is one of the first steps to destroying our freedoms and individuality. Here are the top ten books that had complaints filed against them in 2007 (wow, not a Harry Potter? it has been a while since that happened)...and the top ten of the 21st century (through 2005 at least) I suggest you read them all.

10 Most Challenged Books of 2007

1. “And Tango Makes Three,” by Justin Richardson/Peter Parnell - Reasons: Anti-Ethnic, Sexism, Homosexuality, Anti-Family, Religious Viewpoint, Unsuited to Age Group
   
2. "The Chocolate War,” by Robert Cormier - Reasons: Sexually Explicit, Offensive Language, Violence
3. “Olive’s Ocean,” by Kevin Henkes - Reasons: Sexually Explicit and Offensive Language
4. “The Golden Compass,” by Philip Pullman - Reasons: Religious Viewpoint
5. “The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn,” by Mark Twain - Reasons: Racism
6. “The Color Purple,” by Alice Walker - Reasons: Homosexuality, Sexually Explicit, Offensive Language,
7. "TTYL,” by Lauren Myracle - Reasons: Sexually Explicit, Offensive Language, Unsuited to Age Group
8. "I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings,” by Maya Angelou - Reasons: Sexually Explicit
9. “It’s Perfectly Normal,” by Robie Harris - Reasons: Sex Education, Sexually Explicit
10. "The Perks of Being A Wallflower,” by Stephen Chbosky - Reasons: Homosexuality, Sexually Explicit, Offensive Language, Unsuited to Age Group

10 Most Challenged Books of the 21st Century (2000-2005)

1. Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling
2. "The Chocolate War,” by Robert Cormier
3. Alice series by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor
4. "Of Mice and Men" by John Steinbeck
5. "I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings,” by Maya Angelou
6. "Fallen Angels" by Walter Dean Myers
7. “It’s Perfectly Normal,” by Robie Harris
8. Scary Stories series by Alvin Schwartz
9. Captain Underpants series by Dav Pilkey
10. "Forever" by Judy Blume

I find it depressing that some people in this country must try to tell others what to think or read. I think most people are smart enough to read what they like and avoid what they don't, so do we really need to ban a book? Only because you are afraid of it. Books are books and most people will not believe everything they read, so lets read and have a discussion instead of living in fear. I have read about half of them from both lists, I hope to read the rest soon.