Friday, September 7, 2012

What I Got for the Money

Bags of Crap have still been slipping through my grasp...oh, I have been tantalizingly close a couple time.  Woot people (wooters?) know what I mean...seeing the Crap and submitting Your order only to be told it had sold out in the past 5 seconds that it took to process your order.  It is so frustrating...but then the feeling of supreme triumph when you finally do snag a bag of crap wouldn't exist if it was easy.  However, just because I understand that the rarity of getting a BoC is one of the things that makes it special; this knowledge does not allay feelings of frustration and disappointment from missing out.

Luckily, Graveyard Mall (GYM) was there for me once again to provide a sense of mystery and gambling into my life with their Custom Mystery Box.  GYM's mystery boxes are popular that they keep making new versions:  Kitchen Mystery Box, Women's Mystery Box, As Seen On TV Mystery Box, Candle Mystery Box, etc...  Those are all well and good, but they don't hold the same draw for me as the Custom Mystery Box.  I think it is because the other mystery boxes are so limiting on what they contain.  As I have said before, what you are really buying is hope and a sense of anticipation...there could be anything in the box before it actually arrives.  It's the whole Schrödinger's Cat syndrome...until you actually check, it could be your dreams (or crap).  The Custom Mystery Box is unique in that, you tell GYM a little about yourself and they try to pick items that will suit you...although I am sure some (most) items are overstocked and everyone probably gets them.
Anytime I get a box, I reenact scene
from Seven in my mind:
"What's in the box? What's in the box!"

Once again, I was surprised how big the box was when it came.  I think it was bigger than last time, although not quite as heavy.  It didn't have as many items as last time either, although a couple were definitely bigger ticket items.  Here is what I got for $30 + $6 shipping (in the order that they came out of the box).  You should be able to click to embiggen all photos.

Reflection of me not included...
that costs extra.
1)  Iowa State Cyclone Scoreboard Clock (with date & temperature) - I am not really a Cyclone fan.  Not through any fault of theirs.  It is just that I am not much of a sports fan at all (except for hockey) and when people are talking sports I mostly just think "Go sportsball team!" or "He excels at the game in which he plays."  This is the large wall clock version that they had a couple years looks to be around 13" x 9", not the smaller desk clocks available now.  My brother has a Hawkeye version that he got for Christmas a few years ago...I am pretty sure at that time these clocks retailed for around $80 (but I think have been on clearance since then for about half that).  When unboxed for the picture, I did notice that a small part of the plastic housing had broken.  It was on the back though and wouldn't be visible and could easily be fixed with a little super glue.  This is a really nice clock...just not for me, so my friend Cam (who is a big cyclone fan) just got a bonus birthday present.  Happy Birthday Hetero-Life Pal.

A little creepy and!
2) Littler Dippers bunny airfresheners by Ganz (2 pack) - Fabric rabbits that have a wax base and smell like "Fresh Peaches."  And yes, yes they do smell like peaches.  When I first opened the box it was a little over-whelming (and this is with the bunnies still in their plastic wrap), but they smelled pleasant once the air moved around a little and dispersed the aroma.  I can't imagine working in a store with a bunch of these on the shelf, I think it would make you want to vomit, especially if it was a bunch of competing smells.  Hmmm, I am not really a rabbit guy, so maybe one will get gifted to my niece...or maybe they will get thrown in the back of a closet to freshen out of site (waiting quietly in the dark, eyes slowly going blind, waiting for their chance to attack).  I couldn't find this model must have been a limited run!  Amazon sells a puppy version though (that has a springtime floral scent) for around $10 each.  I have to think these were overstocked and just thrown in the box without looking at the "custom" info.  Oh, well.  I didn't want to open the plastic, so I am not sure if just the wax base was smelly or the cloth too.  It kind of looked like the cloth fabric had a bit of a wax coating so that the rabbits could be posed a little bit, but I am not sure...if so, the thought of touching them creeps me out.  On second thought, these will be given away.

yep, that's what it does.
3)  Hoselink Quick Connect System - Designed in Australia, this is a quick connect/disconnect system for your hose and outdoor faucets.  Which is pretty cool, although I probably don't change my hose and accessories enough to justify this.  Since I didn't plant a vegetable garden this year, I don't even think I have used my hose more than once.  However, my nozzle did break last fall, so just getting a new nozzle is nice.  This kit sells for $25 on Amazon.  Looking at Hoselink's website, it almost looks like hoses down under don't come with the typical threaded ends we see here, and you just push the end of an unfinished hose onto a push-on hose fitting.  If that is the case, I can see how this quick connect system would be really useful there.  And if that is true, I consider it information learned and knowledge is priceless...I will now consider myself a well informed connoisseur of Australian hose workings.

Yes, a nuclear blast just went
off outside my window.
4) Black Leather Desk Clock with Double Pen Stand by Buddy Products - So yep, it is a black leather desk clock with double pen stand, not much else to say about it...oh except "Leather...nice. Leattthhhaaa!" <said in Tin Tin's voice>.  Oh, did I forget to mentiion that it is from the Roma Collection.  THE Roma you know it's quality.  OK, I have no idea what the Roma collection is, but this thing seems like a decent enough clock and pen's just not my style.  I don't believe in putting personal belongings on my desk: A) it often just looks messy and unprofessional, B) if I have a reason to quit I want to be able to just walk out without worrying about personal belonings, and C) I know someone would steal one of the pens and then I would have a sad empty pen stand always taunting me about the absence of the pen.  It's decent enough I guess, but it reminds me of something that a kid would get for his dad for Father's Day.  Holy crap - Amazon sells this for $40. I really figured that it would be $10...Roma Collection indeed!

Have some pride in yourself.
5) Coralite dust-away Sweeper (2 pack) - generic sweeper brooms similar to Swiffer.  No cleaning cloths were included...but sounds like they work with pretty much any generic cleaning cloth.  This actually is pretty good for me, I have hardwood floors throughout the house and my Swiffer broom broke a while back.  I've been meaning to buy a new one but always forget.  My one problem with these is the lack of confidence...not by me, but by the company.  Shouldn't your product's name be capitalized?  It should be "Dust-Away" like you mean it, instead of "dust-away" kind-of, we think, maybe.  Plus you capitalize Sweeper?  That is the part that isn't part of the proper noun.  It's like calling myself michael-gubby Human.  Capitalization - you are doing it wrong.  dust-away you will be considered inferior until you get some pride in yourself and capitalize correctly.  These run $6 on Amazon.

a secret weakness
6) Common Sense Socks, Black (12 pairs) - I believe GYM sold these a while back as "12 pairs of brand name socks for $15."  Yes, I guess they do have a brand name on them, "Common Sense", but it is not a brand name that I have ever heard of, nor did a 5 second internet search yield any results.  A little known fact about me - I love new socks, but at the same time hate buying new socks.  I don't know why but for some reason I have a hard time just randomly buying new socks.  So, I usually wait until all my current socks are completely destroyed and have holes before breaking down and buying new socks.  For this reason, I am actually pretty happy about this item in the mystery box.  I usually get athletic style socks in either white or black...these are not as thick as those (I am trying them out today), but are much thicker than your standard dress socks.  So although I wish there was a little more padding for my tender, baby-like soft feet;  these are pretty comfortable and surprisingly warm for their thickness.  Also made in the USA, so I am literally standing on other citizen's hard work and it feels like...Freedom!  Not really, it feels like 85% acrylic and 15% nylon elastic.

pretty happy with this
7) Dickies TW769 Storm Fleece Pullover - This is my favorite item out of the box.  I don't need another hoodie as I have many, but this is a good looking unit and pretty darn comfy.  Water resistant fleece with a quarter zipper for easy of dressing and removal (looks closer to 1/2 zipper to me, but whatever, it works nice).  Laminated forearm for increased water protection.  Kangaroo pocket, as well as, zippered pocket in front; and small zippered pocket on bicep.  Looks good and feels warm.  Retail was originally $52.  It is slightly big on me, so I am deciding whether to keep or give as a gift.  I know it probably ruins my hipster cred, but I am usually not a Dickies fan...but this is really nice item.

Adding it all up (at original MSRP or the best price that I can find) that makes this box worth about $240...that makes it 87.5% off retail.  Not too bad.  I got some things that I like and some gifts for others.  I felt like I got a pretty good deal.

Win! Win! Win!'s a profit deal. Takes the pressure off!
I do have a few things that I can't use (i.e. - desk clock, smelly bunnies, and a handful of other stuff that I have gotten from mystery boxes and bags of crap in the past) - do you want a chance to win a crap item that I don't have a use for?  It's easy - just send me an email with the subject "I want crap!" and your name in the body...just so I know who I am talking to.  I will randomly select some winners from all entrants at the end of September 2012...and I will send you FREE CRAP.  I paid for this crap, but will send it to you for that you too can know the anticipation, hope, and eventual disappointment of expecting crap in the mail.  Sorry, this offer is only limited to those in the United States, and if you win I will need a physical address to ship to (sorry - no PO Boxes or  APOs).


Cameron Ted said...

I get yelled at when I bring home crap :(

Michael said...

I read this comment in the voice of the "nobody ever pays me in gum" Trident Layers guy.

Cameron Ted said...

then you sir understood exactly where I am coming from