Thursday, July 8, 2021

Concert Chronicles - KISS (w Faster Pussycat & Slaughter) 1990-06-02 Des Moines, IA

 As a kid, I loved KISS.  I still like them quite a bit, but probably not as much as I did when I was younger.  I loved the music, the makeup, the theatrics.  The Dynasty album was the first record that I specifically asked for as a birthday present.  I got it for my sixth birthday.  Ripping the wrapping paper off the album and seeing their painted faces was like opening the briefcase in Pulp Fiction.  I could just feel it shine on me.  It is one of my top memories.

I immediately went to play it on our record player.  It played terribly with lots of loud pops, skips, repeats, and jumps.  I was pretty dejected.  Eventually, I convinced my parents to return it to Sears (remember when Sears has a decent size record selection?) and get a new copy.  They agreed but it would be several days before they would have the time.  In the meantime, I listened to my scratched KISS album over and over and over.  An eternity later (or so it felt), we get a new copy...but, it plays exactly the same.  We figured it must be a manufacturing defect and I continued to listen to that pop, scratchy, skipping album for the next 5-6 years. I know, I drove my older brother crazy with the album and I am sure that the opening bars of Charisma fill him with dread to this day. I know this album is considered KISSco (Kiss-disco) but I still love it.

About 5-6 years after first getting this album, I got a new record player...and the record played perfectly (well as perfectly as a 5-year-old, child owned and played record can).  It wasn't a manufacturing defect after all.  It was the 1950/60s (and probably original needle) record player that I had been using.  This record player had belonged to my mom and was all I knew as a child.  So now, I could hear the record how it was supposed to sound!  But to this day my brain still misses all the pops and skips and will insert them in my mind every time I hear a song from this album.

So 10 years later, KISS is touring on their Hot in the Shade tour.  I still listened to KISS regularly and still had a KISS banner on my wall.  My friend Andrew was also a KISS fan and we decide we have to go see the local show and rush out to buy tickets (I actually won tickets from the local radio station to the show too, but gave them to my brother).  It is my first general admission show and I decide that I want to be in the front row and get the complete fan experience.  Andrew and I convince my older brother to drop us off at the venue around 9am (showtime was 8pm) to be first in line.  We are still not first but we are only a few people in front of us.  We waited and waited, slowly more people showed up.  I had imagined that it would be a group of people that I would have a lot in common with (and hopefully some cute girls to talk to) but the people that showed up early were mostly the 40-year-old stoner and boozer types that just wanted to get wasted before the show.  We were pretty much ignored as "just kids", so Andrew and I barely even talked to anyone during our 10-hour wait.





It was forecasted to be a warm day (and long for us), so we came equipped with a 12 pack of Coke, a 12 pack of Minute Maid orange soda, a box of twinkies, and a bag of chips.  This was a mistake.  It was warm and the two of us had drunk all the soda by about 5pm.  We had to pee...badly, but there were no bathrooms available nearby.  We held it but seriously felt like we were going to burst.  I am pretty sure that is the worst that I have ever had to use a bathroom.  But eventually, the countdown to the doors opening had come and we were extremely excited and we could somewhat ignore the bladder pain.  

By the time the doors opened, there were hundreds and hundreds of people in line and we were proud to be right at the front.  The doors opened and everyone behind us suddenly rushed forward.  I was pushed to the side and was getting smashed on the post between the double doors.  I could not move and I was starting to really get crushed.  Luckily, Andrew was able to grab my arm and pull me through while pushing at the others rushing in.  My left ribcage, arm, hip, and leg were completely bruised the next day from this.  Crowds can be scary and dangerous.  We got inside and had still had to pee urgently, so that took precedence over getting front row so we headed to the bathrooms.  Urinating when you have to go that badly is more difficult than you would expect.  It's like your body is clamping down so hard to keep you from pissing yourself that it is difficult to start to release.  Once we were able to finally get flowing it was almost orgasmic.

We headed out to the main floor (I thought there would be chairs! I didn't realize that general admission usually meant standing only in the main area) but after checking it out, I decided that my left side was too sore from getting squished entering that I needed to sit.  So much for well-laid plans to get in the front.  We found some decent seats in the balcony on Gene's side and waited for the show to start.  I was mildly looking forward to Faster Pussycat but didn't really care for Slaughter (Up All Night was way overplayed at this time).  Unfortunately, the guy next to me was pretty drunk and All Slaughter All the Time!  Before the show and during Faster Pussycat he kept regaling me with stories about how much he liked Slaughter, why Mark Slaughter was so awesome, and how much he was going to screw all night to Up All Night.  I continuously told him that I didn't care and that I was trying to watch the show but to no avail.  I thought about changing seats but these seats had one great advantage - there were some cute girls right behind us that had cut off their shirts to just below their breasts.  Every time they would raise their arms and scream (which they did a lot) their shirts would rise up exposing their breasts.  So with a little bit of a head tilt, we could see boobies were jiggling above us quite often.  This was awesome for teenage boys.  There was a lot of boob flashing in the crowd that night (I don't remember any at Prince or Tom Petty).

Faster Pussycat was OK, Slaughter was OK but I was really mostly just waiting for KISS.  The lights go out and the announcer says "You wanted the best, you got the best.  The hottest band in the world...KISS!"* and the crowd went crazy.  I was surprised at the crowd noise level difference between the opening bands and the main act.  It seemed like a lot of people were cheering and singing along with Slaughter, but that paled in comparison to KISS.  The crowd was loud and then energy was intense.  It was so cool hearing all these songs that I listened to for years played live.  I thought it was a great show - the music, the lights, the lasers, the boobs!  THIS was a rock and roll show.  The only thing missing was KISS wearing their makeup (and as always, I wished that they played something from Music From the Elder).  I spent all the money I had on a couple of concert tees (one which was later stolen and one fell apart) and a Crazy Nights picture disc record (which I still have).  I think this concert is the one that really started my love for concerts.

*At the time, I thought this was pretty clever - "Ha! he is doing the intro from the Alive album.  That's funny."  I did not realize that this was done EVERY SINGLE TIME Kiss plays.  I would soon grow to hate it.


Setlist from Setlist.fm



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