Two Minute Hate Tuesday

Iowa State Choose Your Own Adventure Commercials


Central Iowans have probably seen the ISU's Choose Your Own Adventure commercials. They started out last year (maybe two) with semi-famous / semi-prominent people who went to ISU giving a kind of high point tour of the college. I think one was a playwright and the next was a journalist...I don't really remember because I've already graduated from college and don't plan on going back. The commercials would feature the person in various places around the college campus saying "This is where I..." - studied for chemistry, decided to try a one person play, was told that I would make a great journalist, etc... Nothing really spectacular but still vaguely interesting about how their college careers had changed along the way. I thought this was a pretty good college slogan because like a Choose Your Own Adventure book, you are often trying different paths and not sure where you will end up. It is all part of the journey. Well played ISU.



This year the commercials have devolved into supposedly current students (they could be students, they could be actors - I don't know), just randomly saying stuff that they want to do or know. Here is an example:


I understand what it is trying to say: There is a lot that you can do and explore at Iowa State but they always seem to throw in one stupid desire that has nothing to do with the school. In this case, it is "Be in a band." Sure there are various bands in the music department, but I don't think this is what she is talking about. Even this is mild compared to some of the other commercials. The one the drives me crazy is this dork saying all these things like "I want to cover a major news story. No, I want to be in a major news story...." Of course, he doesn't specify what part of a major news story he wants to be in, so lets all assume that he ends up getting busted for Date Rape. This ad ends with the stupidest line I have ever heard in a college commercial (let me emphasize EVER): "I want to know what a quesadilla is." A quesadilla? Really? You are 17 years old (at minimum) and you don't know what a quesadilla is? There are no Taco Bells in your town? Here you go: Quesadilla...I just saved you 4 years and $40,000. Sorry to say it but I don't think college is going to help you. You will probably be too distracted by such strange and foreign objects as Tacos, Spaghetti, and Canadian Bacon...watch out for the Sweet and Sour Oriental Chicken, it is a real doozy. I don't want to blow your mind. Really...this is the kind of student that ISU wants to attract? Someone who doesn't know what a quesadilla is. Talk about celebrating mediocrity.

End Hate.