Wednesday, March 11, 2009

It's a banner f*@#ing year at the Gubby household.

My birthdays usually suck...several years I have only received cards from the likes of my mom and grandma. Not that it is a huge deal...I don't really expect gifts but still it kind of sucks when no one seems to remember. This year has been off to a great start.

First, Hetro Life Pal CT buys me the Doomsday Pegacorn Clock (I am pretty sure it is ticking down to the destruction of Earth). Thanks again CT! I haven't found a permanent place for it yet...but it still brings me much joy. Assuredly your present this year will bring you just as much joy and agony.

Secondly, I got a good present from Marlboro. They sent me these cool aluminum dice.

I am not sure if they are really aluminum or just chrome plated dice (they feel heavier than I would expect normal dice to be but I guess that could be the nickel and chromium). Either way, I think they are pretty snazzy and will go well with Trivial Pursuit the next time I play.

Why would Marlboro send me dice for my birthday? Well because they take care of their smokers and I have been a registered smoker with them for about ten years...even though I have maybe taken two puffs in my life. I always figured that the cigarette companies are pretty evil and I want to do them harm, but I am I will sign up as a smoker and get free gifts from them - no purchase necessary. Wastes their money to make it, send it, and hey I get free stuff - zippos, carabiner key chains, etc... You get a gift each year for your birthday and then 3 or 4 throughout the year (they send you a letter and you have to confirm online.) Do I worry about lying to Marlboro? Fuck no. I've had to breath their secondhand smoke for years and years when I go to bars and concerts...they owe me.

I like the dice, they are much cooler than last years "personal" ashtray...yep an ashtray that was about 1.5 inches in diameter. It had good weight and would make for great object to throw at some one's head...but utterly worthless to both the smoker and non-smoker alike in any other way. It was given away. The picture actually makes it look bigger than it actually is.

Anyhow, GF-Unit is taking me on a surprise getaway this this year has been great for me.
PS - don't smoke, it is gross...but take those bastards for free gifts all you want.


kelly said...

Hey! Smoke up, Johnny!

I had no idea the Pegacorn Clock was so huge. It truly is the Doomsday Clock.

Michael said...

It looks glorious! And Evil. It could totally beat sasquatch.