Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Two Minutes Hate

Quoting Milton...

(since it is April)

I don't mind Milton and Paradise Lost but I don't love it either.  I know it is supposed to be one of the greatest pieces of literature ever, but I personally didn't find it that great.  Yes, it had some amazing parts, some awesome visuals, and some interesting ideas...but it also had many parts that were completely boring and lasted way too long for my taste.  This post isn't about that work itself.

This Two Minute Hate is about the people who quote Milton.   Specifically, the people who quote the line Satan's line of "Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven."  Anyone who quotes this line referring to themselves is almost certainly acting like a total asshole and is not going to listen to anyone.  Fine.  I just want to make a couple points.

Neither Satan nor Milton were talking to you.  Satan was giving a speech to his rebel angel followers, who were tossed into a lake of fire.  You are far from a rebel angel, you are just an idiot who once heard this quote and since you thought it sounded cool, you use it to justify your shitty behavior.  You are a loser.  You really aren't even evil, just a jerk (or maybe a Jerk Too).

I am no religious expert - but I have read the Bible, the Qur'an, the Bhagavad Gita, as well as Milton (Oh, have you actually read the Milton poem that you are quoting?).  I've also taken more than a handful or religion and philosophy classes.  Admittedly, I went through a phase.  My point is, that I am no expert but I am pretty sure that is not the way if works.  Just because you are some jerkoff doesn't mean you get to reign in hell.  In fact, instead of reigning, you are going to be Satan's little bitch.  I think the Satan and your role was best summed up by Satan's part in this Tenacious D song.  Enjoy gargling mayonnaise.

Now stop being a Dick.

End Hate.


Cameron Ted said...

but would you rather laugh with the sinners, than cry with the saints? Sorry. I was being a dick. There are a few things, I didn't enjoy reading that are great (so I am told) Milton, Shakespeare, Canterbury Tales, Dante.

But like I said earlier, I am a dick.

Word: Conquez. Like All your base belong to us after we conquez you.

Michael said...

I actually like Shakespeare...but you have to get in the rhythm and it can be frustrating finding the right rhythm.

Canterbury Tales was OK but overrated especially since there was no fucking ending.

kelly said...

Canterbury Tales has butt kissing and farting in the face. What about that doesn't translate to "Classic"?